"I am building a road, Lord."

I was praying to God and asked him this week, why I felt depressed? Why do i feel like a failure? Why does He care about me?



The more I work on myself the more I see through the clear water of the river of my heart, the more I realize that I am not clean.



I've been struggling with that for a long time (Ecc 3)



This is what He said in my journey, "when I walk through the valley of the shadow of death," when I get out He brought me a few thoughts for a few minutes, which seemed much longer.



He said that there is something to be given and He gave me the instruction.



Then after He showed me what I was doing. I just think someone has to answer this because I don't have the answer yet, I don't understand. I know it is not only about me, it is about God, so if I don't understand, someone has to.



After that He showed me the road and asked me what i was doing. I answered, "I am building a road, Lord." He said, "Do you understand what you are doing?" So I answered, "I am building a road that is paved with stone. I do not know what I am really doing, but I follow my coworker's experience. I trust him because you told me to.



It is hard to explain the thought because when this was happening, I couldn't literally see or hear Him, I could feel Him. I knew it was Him because I felt the peace around.



Then after, He showed me again the same road and I saw the military walking on it. Then i understood that I was preparing the way for the Lord. I am not quite sure what to do yet, what it means. He just said to wait for the right time.